On November 5, at about 8:30 in the evening, my mom suddenly collapsed. My youngest brother, Jared, was home with her at the time, and despite his heroic CPR efforts, and the efforts of medical personnel at the hospital, she was gone. A beautiful woman, who was kind, generous and giving beyond belief, was gone just that suddenly.
The unexpected nature of her passing means that there were no good-byes, and very little preparation. I am still trying to decide if that was a blessing or not. I think it was, in the sense that I know full well that my mom would have hated to be chronically sick and bedridden, dependent upon others for care. She could barely stand to have diabetes, and was thoroughly tired of the constant need to manage it, though she did a really good job of that. She hated being "sucked in" to the medical arena, hated having to watch everything she ate, hated being scolded by her doctors (and her daughter) to do more.
But it was also hard to not have had that last opportunity to talk to her, to say good-bye. I guess we never know when our time will come, or that of our loved ones, so the best we can do is to show and tell those we love just how much they mean to us every chance we have. She always remembered every grandchild's birthday, sent home-made Valentines, loved each of us unconditionally. She truly was one of the most selfless people I have ever known. Even during the funeral preparation, I found myself thinking I wanted to call her about this or that that happened, and I'm still doing that.
One blessing is that we had a surprise birthday picnic for Mom's 75th birthday just a month before her passing.
This is one of my most favorite of the few shots of my mom and dad, taken at Grandma and Grandpa Pyne's house.
